A man’s penis is a marvellous bit of gear: it is an indicator of health problems long before the symptoms may become apparent.

The Massachusetts Male Aging Study showed poor quality erections were a significant predictor of an adverse cardiovascular event during the next five years.  Meaning, a heart attack is more likely in men who are having difficulties initiating or sustaining a firm erection. This is most likely due to poor blood flow in the penile arteries as a result of fatty plaques narrowing the bore of the arteries and limiting flow. Exactly what happens in the heart leading up to an ‘adverse cardiovascular event’. Apparently these fatty plaques can’t tell the difference between a coronary artery and a penile artery – they just clog it up.

Here is the message – if your health wand is sending out it’s warning, you need to address the underlying lifestyle risks causing the fatty plaques to gum up the plumbing. These include smoking, obesity, diet, cholesterol, blood sugar control and blood pressure. It would also help to undertake regular exercise.  If you don’t, getting an erection may be the least of your problems down the track.

Here is some other warnings your penis can alert you to:

• If you can’t see it – you are too fat
• If you cant reach it – you are way too fat
• If it won’t pee straight – you may have an obstruction
• If it won’t start peeing – your prostate may be enlarged
• If it won’t stop peeing – you may be drunk
• If it dribbles when you think you are done – you are not alone
• If it burns when you pee – you may have an infection

See how useful it is? No wonder the girls wish they had one.